Birthday(s)

Err.. I wonder if it sounds weird to say Birthdays. Obviously, because one can't have more than one birthday :P. Nonetheless, people celebrate their "birthday" every year religiously. Of course, the definition of celebration varies by leaps and bounds. I was never very comfortable with idea of celebrating birthday. The day one is born is gone, so what is there to celebrate every year. Moreover, that day the new-born would not even have realized that he was born. So, why celebrate a day when you were at the peak of your ignorance, when you were totally dependent on others.

Come to think of the traditions associated with birthdays and it completely defies logic. First and foremost is, of course, to cut a cake and blow candles. What does that signify? You could relate it to a million things but I can only think of it as a sure shot way to put on some unwanted calories and search for a place to keep so many candles that you might never use. Next comes the much dreaded birthday-bums. Now, what can I say about this age-old "tradition". Pain-in-the-a$$??? Oh! Come on, how can I feel I am celebrating something if I am being kicked hard on my you-know-where. Moreover, all of a sudden your friend-list multiplies to perform these 2 activities - eating cake and bashing you. That reminds me of the next birthday-torture - phone calls. The whole day your phone rings incessantly. Even at 12 midnight, for God's sake. All aunties, uncles, cousins, friends, old-enemies.. and oops.. I forgot, even mobile service providers, mall owners, jewellers, office HR people suddenly decide to shower all their love and affection on you on this special occasion. Ya, I completely believe that they were elated the moment you were born. Ohh.. how can I forget the most important part, namely, TREAT!! Yes, aren't you supposed to be "celebrating" your birth by taking all your hi-bye friends to the best restaurant available in town and blowing away all your hard-earned money. (I think I can now relate to the candle-blowing custom. It must be symbolically representing emptying your pockets)

Okkk.. I can hear you guys. I have completely ignored one other aspect of birthdays called gifts. Every year, its the gifts that make you feel wanted, that keeps you going, that makes you feel that all that you did against your wish was justified 'cause at least a handful of your friends had fun at your expense. You want to filter out and remember the nicest moments of the day. Of course, not because it was your birthday but because it was a day when some people showed that they cared and you know best as to which ones really meant it. One would be insane to derive conclusions based on the cost of the gift. Something as simple as a heartfelt thought is a big enough gift. So, if there were no birthdays, when would people tell their loved-ones that they mean a lot to them. Everybody has the option of doing it on any freakin' day, but the fact is that nobody does it. I understand all of this when I put myself in the shoes of the person attending a birthday party. By principle, I never attend birthday parties of people who mean nothing more than a useless weed to me. So, I wonder if I would have ever intentionally showed any friend of mine that I loved and cared for him/her and wanted him/her to be happy, had it not been for the person's birthday!! Maybe, maybe not.

So now I reckon that all celebrations, be it birthday, festival, any function, any get-together is all for a common reason. That is to feel lively enough to live. Giving and receiving love and affection is the crux. Feeling happy, doing masti and enjoying together is the motive. The rest of the things are add-ons (mostly not very logical but emotional, historical, traditional, cultural, religious blah blah) and hence get modified as time passes. So whether you make modaks for Ganesh chaturthi or not, you surely buy new clothes and at least, wish to go to dance in your society. Whether you even know the reason for celebrating Diwali or not, you sure want to burst crackers. I am not complaining though:P. After all, if it makes one happy, then why not do it!?

I had this mind-wave because those around me made this birthday of mine really really special. I felt so overwhelmed thinking of the day that I could not help but write this post. Irrespective of whatever they did for me on my birthday, I always knew that they loved me. Of course, they showed it in a million different ways throughout our lifetimes. However, this day just served as a day for me to specially sit back and rejoice my friendship with each one of them, to remind myself that I am amongst the very lucky ones. I used to have my own reservations about 'illogical' celebrations. But now, my opinion has slightly changed. To live life king size, celebration in some or the other form cannot be done without :D

Warning: Don't come charging to my house asking for a treat in return for your free (please note, I am not using the virtuous word priceless but the 'cheapo' word free) wishes, hugs, thoughts etc. etc. Do remember that I said that I can see through the ulterior motives of con men ;)

Anger Management

There are loads and loads of books, seminars, shows, treatments etc. etc. for "Anger Management", "Short Temper" blah blah... To me, they are all the same. What varies is only the degree of anger, the tolerance level of each individual. I strongly feel that if one can control the momentary loss of temper, he can go a long way in diminishing, if not eliminating, anger from his life. My answer to this is the most effective but the most difficult one to achieve. Whatever the case, the best thing to do when you can feel your top blowing up is to remain silent. It takes a LOT to do this. The least benefit is that you do not damage anything. By damage, I mean damage to property, damage to relationships, damage to your own dignity etc. etc.. Some wise man once said, "Arrow, words and time will never return". So better not say things which you never meant to. It can cause irreparable damage.

Agree, it is certainly easier said than done. But I have a few ways to pull myself to shut my mouth when that is the vent my anger is looking for. The moment I feel the itch on my tongue, I force myself to think of the universe, space, galaxies and what not and remind myself of how minute a creature I am and how insignificant, how futile this fight is to the cosmos. Then I tell myself that I am not a very virtuous person. So, I should try my bit and exercise control over such meaningless "pleasures". After all, its all mind over matter. I also try to recollect all those unpleasant memories I have because I blabbed something someday somewhere in anger. In the end, I hammer it in my brain that by speaking now, I am gonna be the one at loss by all means. I might get instant pleasure by yelling immediately but I'll multiply the bitterness and carry it longer with me. Anyway, just yelling results in nothing at all. It is a weak man's vent to his anger.

With all the above and more, I realized that my anger did not melt instantly. It took its own sweet time. But I did not budge to the calls of my ire to blurt out curses and swear words. And in less than 2 minutes, I had a heavenly feeling. I reckon that the bomb squad must be feeling that way after diffusing a bomb. Also, at leisure, if I recollect 2-3 such instances, I feel I made my life better, if not anybody else's.

Gradually, I started behaving better with people. I took things more lightly and did not over react to a situation. I started respecting people more and believing that everybody is good. I started laughing at situations that would earlier leave me fretting and fuming. For eg., I used to curse the rick guys who refused to come to the destination of my choice and feel like whacking them hard. Now, I just 'drink' my anger and move on to the next one. I used to feel like kicking those who break the queue. Now, I just request them with a smile. It may or may not work. But, if I get angry and shout at them, it WILL NEVER work. If not anything, I definitely feel I'm a more refined person and feel life is better this way. Give it a try, I am sure you'll not regret :P

Please note that by preaching suppression of squabbling and bickering, I am, by no means suggesting that one should not get angry over things that deserve to be corrected. For example, wrong policies in a company, corrupt politicians, pollution of environment, crime etc. should make one angry so that one can try his bit to change it. Even in this case, simply yelling will yield nothing :D... Remember, I said its only the degree that varies, the solution remains the same....

Driving us crazy!!

How many times has it happened that you're standing for the traffic signal to turn green and 

you see somebody zoom past you? How many times have you seen a bike racing at 80-90 kmph on crowded city roads? How many times have you seen guys riding bikes without wearing helmets? How many times has a cyclist or a motorist overtaken you from the left side and pushed his way ahead of you? How many times has a guy honked at you even when the signal is scarlet red? How many times has a guy suddenly decided to turn right from the left most lane? How many times have you seen a college kiddo wobbling on his 2-wheeler right in front of you? 

How many times have you seen guys turning right all of a sudden without any indicator? How 

many times have you seen someone crawling at 45kmph on highway on the right-most lane that 

is meant for speeding? I am sure almost 80% of this is part and parcel of your everyday 

life. 

And hell, WHY ARE ONLY WOMEN DRIVERS BLAMED ALL THE TIME??? Men are equally bad or rather worse. There is no proof that the percentage of bad women drivers is more than that of bad men drivers. It doesn't matter anyway. Fact is that everyday we suffer more at the hands of nasty men drivers than women drivers. Its so unfair to the fair sex..

Sports!!

I love everything about the title... I love watching, playing, feeling, living sports. However, I don't like sports unconditionally. Carroms or Chess or Golf are a total no-no. I like sports that involve energy and the consequent sweating. Even adventure sports are a turn-on.

I am not particularly patriotic but I am on a high these days 'cause India is in the sports news for the right reasons. Not exactly making a mark and stuff, but something is better than nothing. I adore the fact that we got a good number of medals in CYG (held in Pune :D). I am also totally relishing India's posiiton in the current test-series against Australia (though I know I am being foolish here :P ). Vishy Anand's chess feat is definitely something I am proud of. My belief is that Indians celebrate success too early and that is why we never move ahead. Instead of making a mark, they end up making a blot..

Amongst a zillion other things that I feel, one strong feeling is that each individual should play some sport or the other. Doesn't matter if he is not a pro at it. Feeling that adrenalin rush is something no living soul should do without. Still. with due respect to all mere-players like me, I say that I am crazy about the winners. It takes that extra bit to be a graceful winner and that "extra bit" can have so many names ranging from passion to concentration to fortune to grit to stamina to belief-in-oneself to practise or any of these jargons. Just to clarify, No "idols", no "heart-throbs", no "hero-worship", no "die-hard fan" is just my type. So, I appreciate the technique more than the technician .. D

I can go on ranting about the advantages of playing. Most of it is obvious, so I'll spare the readers. But I'll still mention that playing refines a person. Notice that good players always are composed, humble and grace-personified. 

Let me shed some light into the purpose of this post. One was purely to give vent to my ebullience which resulted from I-don't-know-what. The other was to prod people to play more.. Again,  don't know why.. Vince Lombardi, the American Football Caoch once said, "A school without football is in danger of deteriorating into a medieval study hall."

Doordarshan wassup!

Does the title sound hep? The obvious answer is 'no'. However, MTV Wassup sounds cool and hep and in and what not. Ever wondered why DD does not click? Why are our very own DD1 and DD2 more like a thing of past though they very much exist. Surprising that not even one section of audience vouches for DD. No faithful followers, no 'brand loyalty'??...

A plethora of thoughts flood my mind when I try of think of probable reasons that led to pushing DD into mere oblivion. 

I can't buy it that they have lack of funds to make good and watchable programmes. After all, creativity needs brains, not money. Or so I thought for long until this myth of mine was busted. More on that later. But then why don't they have shows like Roadies, Fear Factor etc. Can't they even copy? Maybe they don't want to. I would have said good, if their alternatives were any better. Come to think of it, DD telecasts a lot of things that other channels feed you with. You name it and they have it - news, saas bahu serials, music channels, sports.. They are yet to catch up with Reality shows though.. But people prefer to listen to the same song on a Channel V or a 9XM over DD. Lets dive deeper and see if we can put one and one together to make two.

DD News: This still is the same as before minus the most adoring music that used to play earlier before the news started. The sets have changed to some extent. Maybe now they are same as the NDTV/CNN IBN etc. sets were in 2000. The news readers still suck with women adorning their big bindis and men 'sporting' their bushy moustache and stern faces. Now, the most important - content?! I will not think twice before admitting that their content is much better than any other 'new-age' news channel. Inspite of this, they read news to the walls. I wonder if DD does not want to thrive on people's insanity and curiosity even if it means losing viewership. What is happening in which star's life, which heroine ditched which hero, who has a hot bahu, who is sporting a tattoo, who slapped whom, which cricketer is crying and blah blah is what is 'sansani and breaking news' these days. It can't be the other way round  - i.e. People not having a choice but to watch only all this crap? 'cause they do have a choice in the form of DD !! So clealy, what matters to people today is not just content, but also form.. Isn't that why Priyanka Gandhi is a much sought-after politician - if she can be called one.

I can't and don't want to speak about Saas Bahu serials 'cause I have no clue of what is the difference between what is shown on DD and the other channels. Maybe DD doesn't buy Asian Paints to paint the faces of their saas and bahu. Whatever...

Coming to Sports. The first sick thing about DD is the 'experts' who come. Looks like DD wants to copy only disgusting ideas from other channels. Just because, Set Max decided to make sports more interesting by roping in Mandira Bedi (I don't want to use an adjective for her for obvious reasons), DD thought they should do the same. The result is this dumb girl you see these days in a particular cricket tournament who has vowed not to talk about cricket but everything else under the sun, like if a cricketer's parents are looking for a match (oops, don't confuse with a cricket match. That's not her business) for him. Sucks!! Why doesn't DD learn from ESPN which has experts like Harsha Bhogle talking. Listening to them is half like watching a good game of cricket. Of course, DD might say in its defence that they have Charu Sharma.. Need I say more?? Don't even want to mention the quality of commentators. 

DD does have music channels but sorry, I don't remember the exact name of their effort here. If other music channels try to make celebrities like Amitabh, Saif, Aishwarya etc. advertise for their channels, DD tries to call Vahida Rehman, Pallavi Joshi etc. I do not mean to take away the credit the latter have earned. Neither do I mean to say that the former are greater than the latter in any way. I just want to say that DD still lives in yester years. They don't want to 'grow up' and 'move on'.  Its like their life stopped in the 80s. All their music shows are the same and most of them have Annu Kappor as the host who doesn't even appeal to aunties in the kitchen. They do not want to have the pep-factor in their shows. They do not care to make sure that the host is presentable and enviously fit and has a strong command over language used these days. Again, they lose out on the most important thing here - content. If you hear a latest song being played in DD, surely the sun must have risen from the west that day. When other channels play the songs of Race, DD must be playing the songs of Guide. Ok, I'll not be so mean, they have advanced and are capable of playing DDLJ. when other hot VJs are wearing tunics, DDs fat 'VJs' (sounds odd to call them that) are clad in funny-looking old-fashioned forgotten-type spaghettis. A giant leap by their own standards.

So, no form, no good sets, no good 'crew members', not enough young people, not the right celebrities, no foray into reality shows, not adapting to changing trends etc. are just a tiiinnyy subset of a host of reasons that pushes DD to darkness. Having said that, I want to clarify that this post should not suggest to you in any way that I want to say that whatever non-DD channels are doing is the right and the best thing to do. This post was only to understand why DD has lost its charm and its viewers. DD guys, I hope you are hearing and you'll rise in such a way that there would be a day when I'll see college kiddos bunking classes just to tune into DD.. Is that a distant dream? Is that too much to ask for?? You have to tell us.. 'cause time will not.. (I always hear this thing about time having answers to everything.. but sorry DD, time will not help you this time!! ). Wake up and Rock On!!

Its not just beauty that lies in the eyes of the beholder

For reason(s) unknown, the song "When the going gets tough, the tough get going" was doing its rounds in my brain. It was so persistent that I had to spare a thought to what it actually meant. But I found myself stuck right at the first line. I wondered when can we truly say that the "going gets tough". The more I thought about it, the more I realised that the answer to this question "lies in the eyes of the beholder". For some, the falling stock market means the end of life; for some, a conked out rocket launch means failure; for some, a flopped movie means one more opportunity lost; for some, a broken heart calls for Rum (Remember, ghum ka saathi rum ??.. ;) ); for some, a failed exam is loss of face; for some, looking bad is hardship; for some, losing 100Rs.is path to penury; for some gaining weight is the biggest curse and the list is endless. So, how do we decide what was "tough". Or, is our life so full of misery that we should call all of the above as "tough"?

Ofcourse not. In fact, what is tough for one, is not really so tough for the other. For eg., for a school-goer, the falling stock market is not a tough situation. For a movie-maker, losing 100Rs. is not a tough situation and so on..

Also, given a situation, each living being decides to act/react in a particular way. How do we decide, who has been "tough"? For eg., one could call the movie-maker tough if he decides to make another movie while another could call him dumb. 

The summary of my rambling and the consequent answer to my musing is that the line "When the going gets tough, the tough get going" is subjective and that everything is just a perspective and relative. Be it beauty or be it a tough situation or be it a tough person or be it anything. Of course, facts are mutually exclusive to perspectives. Oopps.. have I wasted so much of my time in merely stating the obvious?? Or did I lead you to believe that this is obvious? 

Phew! Apologies for torturing my unsuspecting readers. I'll try to write better next time.. 

But again, define "better"... Ok Ok.. I am stopping here.. Not again :)

0s and 1s

This is my blog no. 0, not 1. That would have given away a lot about what the major part of my life was made up of for the past few years. Computers, computer science, technology blah blah blah. I did do some other things on and off to break out of the routine like trekking, other outings, guitar, keyboard, badminton, 'evening-outs', 'night-outs' etc. But still, 8 hours a day in a Software company kind of sucks out all your creativity unless you consciously don't want to give away your personality. So, blogging is yet another effort of mine to keep myself alive. Yes, to me, a person is practically dead if he is nothing but just another employee in a Software Company.
Usually, the first post of anyone, for obvious reasons, describes why they decided to blog. For a change, I decided to stick to convention this time.
I hope I am here to stay...